J Quest Green
Taking marriages to phenomenal because ordinary just won't do...

marriage momentz

Quest Writes...




      May I be transparent with you? There have been times where I have struggled with measuring up. I know what you're saying...YOU? Yes me! People think that because I am an extravert and I love being around people, that I would be the last person to experience those kinds of struggles, and to those same people I would say, you would be surprised to know that we are more alike than we are different. There are times where - to this day - I feel inadequate and I don't measure up, until someone that is of value to me comes along and says something that encourages me in a way that makes me feel and know that I am in the right place doing the right thing. I don't struggle with it as much as I used to, only because I never gave up on the process and along with that comes growth. So before I get long-winded with this I want to tell you a short story and then ask you to do two things... you with me? ...as if you had a choice...lol

      In Jeremiah 1:5 we are reminded that "Before I formed you in your mothers womb I KNEW YOU..." I found this to be very deep because a couple of years ago I read an article by an OBG\YN by the name of Dr. Tamar Goulet and she explained from a biological perspective how a baby was born. She simply stated that when a man and a woman "get together" in efforts to create a child, between 50 to 250 million sperm is released in efforts to fertilize one egg. ONE EGG!! We can go so much deeper with this but with respect to my point, all that sperm is released and only 1 out of 50-250 million sperm get to fertilize that egg and then 9 months later a child is born. I almost immediately heard the voice of God say "Out of 50 - 250 million options I chose you!" What are you saying Quest? I am saying that if you are struggling with feelings of inadequacy or feeling like you don't measure up, dispel those thoughts and feelings and close your ears to the source of those thoughts and feelings, why? Because YOU. ARE. ENOUGH! That's right! God had 50-250 million options and HE CHOSE YOU to be amongst the land of the living. HE. CHOSE. YOU!  SO, Here is the first thing I want you to do:

      1. I want you to go into the bathroom, close the door, look your self in the mirror, in the eyes and say to yourself, YOU ARE ENOUGH! And say it as many times as you need to in order for it to sink in. As a matter of fact, don't stop until it sinks in. With all your quirkiness, mistakes, brokeness, with everything that you THINK is wrong with you, YOU ARE ENOUGH! 

      Before I get to the second thing I want you to do, can I just tell you that I LOVE R&B? Not the stuff you hear on the radio today but old school R&B, you know, like, Atlantic Starr, The Whispers, Luther Vandross; the stuff we used to hear on "the quiet storm" back in the day, the stuff from the 70's 80's and 90's. Truth be told there are a couple of fairly new artists that are trying to keep R&B alive and well by singing songs that dealt with REAL relationship stuff, not just the wham bam thank you ma'am kinda lyrics.  There is one who particularly comes to mind. Yall remember Maxwell? You remember his 1st album? Urban Hang Suite? Phenomenal Album! My mind specifically remembers a song called ASCENSION. The lyrics on the chorus go "shouldn't I realize\your the highest of the High\And if you dont know then I'll say it\So don't eva wonder..." Which brings me to the second thing I want you to do:

      2. Tell your spouse that THEY ARE ENOUGH.  Feelings of inadequacy - in most cases - are never an easy thing to talk about especially if you are the one feeling inadequate. Just like the song says, "and if you don't know then I'll say it, so don't ever wonder..." It's good to know that someone thinks the world of you and I'm sure if your spouse already knows that you think the world of them, it's just as nice to hear you say it. Remember you are enough. Share with your spouse that they are enough too!

Be Blessed,


Quest GreenComment